Ironic how the coming of something can be so dreaded, and yet the absence of that same thing can also be dreaded. Okay, enough of my phylosophical mood. Two words- Aunt Flow. (Dun dun dun...) I am always so disappointed when she comes, and yet terrified when she doesn't. Disappointed because I was desperately wishing to be pregnant. But when she doesn't come and I still find out that I'm not pregnant, then all the worries start.
However, today was the disappointed kind of dread. But there's a silver lining to this cloud. (Actually several silver linings.) First, it appears that I ACTUALLY ovulated according to my month's chart. For those of you who aren't one of us "infertiles," just understand that this is a monumental feat for me. Second, this means I don't have to use provera to induce menses unless Aunt Flow suddenly decides to quit. (Which has happened before, but at least this time it doesn't appear that that will happen.) For those of you who don't know, provera is one of the two most horrible drugs I have thus encountered in my 2 1/2 year infertility journey. My friend Elizabeth has dubbed this drug as "The suicide bomber pill" because of the fact that it makes so many women so screwed up emotionally. So hubby is feeling especially blessed that he doesn't have to endure another round against the monster I become on that stuff. This month is going to be healing for our relationship.
But I have to admit, I was really hoping that this month would be the month it finally happened. Oh well, I guess all we can do is gear up for another try. And that's really not so bad... ;) (wink)
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About Me
- Malone and Brittany
- About us? Where can I begin? Our little family has been through more ups and downs than can be described here. It has been a roller coaster since day one. Join us as we continue on our crazy ride.
2 comments:
That is great!
O to ovulate on my own. Ha ha.
Hopes and prayers for next month. :)
Hang in there sis! Remember, the best thing you can do for you and for your family is take things slowly (even if you are terrified about getting pregnant before a certain date) and try not to worry. The more you stress out over it, the less likely it will happen. Besides, it sounds as though you are already improving significantly!!! Hooray for small miracles!!! "if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them"
You can do it!
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