Day 29 approved and waiting for our baby through the miracle of adoption
So I've been really quiet for the past week. To tell you the truth, we just haven't had much going on. Hopefully things will pick back up here soon.
I have a thought for my friends and family though. I feel it's quite wise, so hopefully you will too. :) As Malone and I have been going through this adoption process, the most frequent question we get is, "are you going to have an open or closed adoption?" Our reply has always been the same, "We want to be as open as the birth family feels comfortable with." Of course, if our birth family wants a CLOSED adoption, we would respect that decision. But if it were our choice, we would want it to be open. I know some of you out there find that surprising, and perhaps you might even have some wary feelings when it comes to open adoption. I think that's probably because of the common misconceptions when it comes to open adoption, but that's another discussion. So, in order to prepare you all for the time when we intend to welcome the entire birth family into our family (hopefully that's not too far away!), I want to share our feelings with you about open adoption.
A few weeks ago I had somewhat of a breakdown. It was just one of those days when I felt so resentful of my infertility. A common element of my prayers for the past 3+ years has been, "WHY? Why do I have to have infertility? Why do I have to go through this trial when it seems like EVERYBODY around me is as fertile as can be? Is this a punishment?" Lately as I've been thinking about it, I've realized that infertility has not been a punishment to me, but rather a blessing. Without infertility, we would not be on this road to adoption. Without infertility, we would not be able to be a part of a birth mother's life and she would not have the opportunity to be a part of ours. I guess I've just recently been impressed at how RIGHT our choice to adopt is. Adoption is meant to be a part of who our children are. And through us, adoption is meant to be a part of all of your lives as well.
Ok, one last thought. The agency we are choosing to go through is LDS Family Services. Their "slogan" (or logo or whatever you want to call it...) is "Adoption... It's About Love." The other day I was thinking about the different sources of love that slogan is referring to. It's talking about the love of the birth family for the baby, the love of the adoptive family for the baby, and the love of God for the baby. That really impressed me. Adoption REALLY is all about love.
About Me
- Malone and Brittany
- About us? Where can I begin? Our little family has been through more ups and downs than can be described here. It has been a roller coaster since day one. Join us as we continue on our crazy ride.
3 comments:
You are so right, you already know that once you meet your baby everything will be worth it and make sense. It's amazing to be a part of adoption! You are going to love it. I hope and pray all the time for you guys to find your miracle soon. The Lord plays such a part in it, he will guide you and give the the inspiration you need to be placed. He is so close. Do not let the adversary tell you that this wont ever happen! He wants you to get discouraged, he wants you to lose your faith and give up! Don't listen to those thoughts!
I hope your baby is born soon, you guys are so deserving!
Another thought that has meant so much to me through all our adoptions is the knowledge that our Heavenly Father loves these children even more than we do. They really aren't ours. We are just given the blessing of raising them in this life. When I look at all my children now, I can't help but ask myself if Heavenly Father is pleased with how I'm taking care of HIS children!
Thanks for this; it brought tears to my eyes. How blessed we are to have LDSFS, an entity that in and of itself is all about love...not about making money off the desperation of families wanting children.
Thankfully, my husband and I have not had any infertility challenges. But I've known for many years that we were meant to adopt some of our children, and I'm excited to start down that path when the time comes.
Also, while you say that you know that infertility has not been any kind of punishment, also know that Heavenly Father has made this timing happen for a reason. So you can meet YOUR baby. :)
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