Scared, Nervous, Excited, Frantic, and miracles

Day 139 approved and waiting for our baby through the miracle of adoption

Oh my gosh, I am so overwhelmed right now. I have five million emotions going through my head that I can't even reign in. I've only had about 12 hours of sleep in three days, because my mind is constantly going a million miles a minute.

We won't get a chance to talk to S again until tomorrow. I have been so anxious all weekend to get to talk to her again! We're so worried about how she's doing. Especially because I think she was planning on breaking the news to some of her family members this weekend that she is planning to place. We have been praying our guts out for her, and my whole family is just so excited.

Right now one of the biggest hurdles on my mind is... travel arrangements. Where do I start!?! The other thing that we're thinking about is buying baby items. For now, we're just buying the essentials. So yesterday we got a car seat, and we're working on getting a diaper bag packed so it will be ready to go at a moment's notice. We are assembling the bassinet that was given to us (Thanks Jeremy and Theresa!) so that it will be ready when we get home. And I have to say, I'm so thankful to my friend Beth who just adopted recently. She put together a list of the essentials she needed when she went to pick up her daughter who was just born in February. That list is now my best friend, and I'm using it like a road map for packing. lol The other question we're trying to find an answer to is... where do we stay? If we can, we would absolutely love to stay with a member of our church who lives in North Carolina so that we can avoid paying a hotel. We're just so tight on our budget right now, anything that we can save will be helpful. Anybody have any contacts new High Point?

Other than that, we had a great time with the fourth of July. We set off fireworks. Twice. (What can I say, I belong to a family of Pyros! :) ) We watched our city fireworks. And today we had our THIRD barbecue in three days. We'll have to post pictures. Eventually. :) It was a really fun day today actually, because my newest niece was blessed in church. She's about 7 weeks old. She looked way too cute in her white dress, and was so quiet and good while all the attention was on her! I'm so excited that our baby will have a cousin so close in age.

Okay, I know this is getting long, but I really have to tell you about this miracle. So my little brother, Bryce, is currently serving a mission for our church in Phoenix. While serving in one of the wards, he got to know this really sweet family, and I guess he happened to mention our story. The mom of this family, Edna, was intrigued so she started following our blog. Well, not too long ago, Edna emailed me. She let us know that she wanted to help us in our journey to adopt and had decided to hold a fundraiser yard sale like the one we did not too long ago and donate the proceeds to our adoption fund. Well, Edna emailed me to let me know that she had raised $200.00 for us in her yard sale!!! This email came just shortly before we found out we were matched with S. I am so touched and humbled at her example of Christlike charity. She is a miracle in our lives! I have also been so overwhelmed and humbled by the outpouring of kindness we have received from everyone since we found out we were chosen. I have had so many offers of donations of baby items, and it is going to save us a ridiculous amount of money. So thank you to all of you. You are touching our life and changing us for the better. THANK YOU!!!

Details about our big, Huge, GIGANTIC news!

Day 137 approved and waiting for our baby through the miracle of adoption

SHE WANTS US!!!!!!!!!! Yesterday evening we had our conference phone call with our birth mom (to protect her privacy, I will just call her S.). (That sounds so exciting to say OUR birth mom!!!) It went really well. It went so well in fact, that the caseworker actually had to come on the line and tell us it was time for the conversation to end, because we were basically just chit-chatting about everything. So we hung up the phone so that the caseworker could have a chance to talk to S. about it. Only about five minutes later, the caseworker called us back and said, "congratulations! She loves you guys, and she definitely wants to match with you." I swear I almost passed out. The caseworker said that S. was saying that she just knew in her heart we were right and that she felt a calm and peace the minute we started talking.

Oh my gosh, so the baby is due in less than three weeks and we actually found out that S. had a labor scare this past Sunday! So this baby really could come any day now. Holy smokes! I have to get ready! We have to buy a car seat! We have to dive into the legal paperwork! I have to buy some baby clothes and pack a diaper bag! (Can you tell I'm feeling somewhat frantic?) I don't believe I've been this stressed ever since hubby and I got married. But it is so worth it. All this craziness will be worth it for our daughter.

So, now I get to go throw myself together for our big BBQ tonight and hope that I'm not toooo scatterbrained about everything. (yeah right!) I'll update more later, but in the meantime, we need everybody to pray and, if you can on Sunday, fast for S., the baby, us, and S.'s whole family. There is some discord right now with some of S.'s family members who don't approve of her adoption plan. We don't want them to hurt her feelings. But she's staying so strong, we're so proud of her. Please pray and fast that she will be able to remain strong and that she will feel comfort and peace in her heart. We just love her so much already.

big, Huge, GIGANTIC news!

Day 136 approved and waiting for our baby through the miracle of adoption

So I know in the previous post I promised more updates on everything that's been going on lately. Well, I'm going to skip that for now in favor of our big news. I'm sure after reading this, you will forgive me.

We got a call about a birth mother who wants to match with us!!! Everything isn't 100% certain yet, because the birth mom wants to have a conference call with us before she absolutely commits to us, but this is looking really solid! I can only share a little bit of information about the situation, because I want to protect her privacy. But here's what I can share:

-The birth mother is in her upper 20's
-She lives near the east coast with her two children whom she is single parenting
-The birth father wants nothing to do with either her or the baby
-The birth mother and the birth father are both African American
-Her due date is July 23 and she is expecting a (drumroll please) GIRL!!!

So here's the part where I get really candid. This match is coming through the matching agency, Adoption Advertising. So it's going to cost us an extra $5,000.00. (Yikes!) We have managed to save up about $6,200.00. But that leaves us short about $4,300.00. We're obviously going to have to take out a loan. But we really would like to take out the least amount possible. So, we are shamelessly asking for help. If you feel like you can spare any amount for our adoption fund, we would be eternally grateful. If you can't, don't feel bad, we understand. But we are hoping to raise at least a little bit more money to reduce the amount of debt that we have to take on. You can either donate with the paypal button on the right, or contact us at maloneandbrittanyadopt@gmail.com for other options.

In the meantime, stay tuned for more updates! We will be having our conference call very soon and I promise to update when we find out! Please pray for us... we're so nervous...

In Tribute

Day 126 approved and waiting for our baby through the miracle of adoption

I am back from my soggy camping trip. I know I have so much to catch up on, but that's just going to have to wait for my next post. Because right now, I have something much more significant on my mind.

Today is my son, Gavin's, second angel-versary. It was two years ago today that I held my precious baby in my arms and said goodbye to him. I miss him like crazy. I think about him every single day. In my mind's eye, I can still remember just what he looked like.

It's hard to believe that if he had lived, I'd be chasing a toddler around right now. But surprisingly enough, I am at peace as I'm thinking about him today. Instead of feeling pain, I feel gratitude. I know that he is watching over me, and because of my religion, I am confident that we will be together again someday. I thank God for that knowledge and for the blessing of peace that's in my heart right now.

Will come back to life!

Day 119 approved and waiting for our baby through the miracle of adoption.

Hello friends... I promise I will come back to life after this week. But tomorrow is the first day of Girls' Camp so I am going to be M.I.A. until Friday. Sorry if you can't get a hold of me! And will you all pray for me and the girls? This is going to be a crazy week, and I'm just hoping that I managed to throw it all together well enough in the short 3 weeks that I've had to prepare.

Oh! My! Gosh!

Day 105 approved and waiting for our baby through the miracle of adoption

So.... I have been absent from blogging, emailing, calling, and most general socializing lately. I know it, but I have a good excuse!!! I recently received my THIRD calling in our ward. (For those of you who aren't members of my church, a calling is a position in our church in which members are asked to serve by our leaders without monetary compensation.) I'm starting to think that God is trying to distract me from the waiting process by flooding my schedule with too much to do.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm perfectly happy to serve in our church, but this is a little confusing. There are TONS of couples in our ward! There are probably people who don't even have one calling, and now I have three. I'm a nursery teacher, the ward literacy specialist, and now I am the ward Girls' Camp director. And get this, Girls' Camp is in just 2 1/2 weeks! Apparently they've had two other women back out on them for this position, so they were pretty desperate.

I am o-v-e-r-w-h-e-l-m-e-d. I think this will be fun, and I'm looking forward to working with the girls, but SERIOUSLY. I have so much to do, where do I start!?!

Needless to say, I'm going to be very busy for a while, so you all might think that I've fallen off the face of the planet. But no worries! I'm just taking a temporary leave! I'll be back, providing this doesn't kill me first! ;)

Taking the plunge

Day 92 approved and waiting for our child through the miracle of adoption

Malone and I have been thinking and praying and debating and praying and thinking some more over the past couple of months about whether or not to take the plunge with the matching agency. When we prayed we kept getting the feeling, "not yet, not yet..."

Well, this past weekend we got the feeling like now is the time to let them start presenting situations to us for consideration. So today we emailed them. The caseworker we have talked with is super nice and optimistic, which really makes a big difference. She is giving the family coordinator the go-ahead to start finding potential matches for us! We are at peace with this decision, but of course the extra $4,400.00 is a bit hard to swallow. We're still going to work hard to raise more money, but we feel like it's within our reach now. Please continue to pray with us and everyone involved.

So I guess that's it for my post today. I have a lot more stuff to post about, including pictures, but it's already WAY past my bedtime. So I'll just have to get back with y'all later!

Guess what? A must read...

Day 83 approved and waiting for our baby through the miracle of adoption

Yesterday was our yard sale, and we had some real success! (pictures to come) The results... We profited almost $400.00! I'm thrilled with how it went. Not only did we sell tons of the donated items, we also passed out at least 100 pass-along cards. Truthfully, that's way more important than the money we made. And here's a little testimony to the importance of being proactive in self-promoting your adoption.

Yesterday afternoon every time someone showed up, I would give them one of our cards and explain what it was. As I was talking to one guy about our card, another lady was browsing through our kids' clothes section. After the guy left, this lady came up to me and quietly asked, "Did I overhear you right? Are you and your husband hoping to adopt?" I said, "yes!" and started getting butterflies in my stomach. I grabbed a card for her really quick, and excitedly started showing her all of our contact information. She had some questions to ask such as if we had any kids or not (I explained a little bit about Gavin), what do we do for a living, if I wanted to be a stay-at-home mom, etc... I answered all of her questions, and she said, "Well, I'll definitely take this card. My best friend's daughter is sixteen and pregnant. She's scared because she doesn't know what to do. I will definitely be giving her this card." Then I explained that LDS Family Services offers free support services to women experiencing unplanned pregnancy, regardless of whether or not they choose to place. I suggested this young lady take advantage of that opportunity no matter what. The woman had one more question for me right before she left. She wanted to know if Malone and I were okay with the fact that this young lady is from Mexico. Of course we said that was perfectly fine! The lady smiled at me, said thank you, and drove off.

Now, I don't know if this will lead to an adoption for us or not. But I can tell you, I never would have reached this woman if we hadn't been self-promoting our adoption. Plus, we had at least 3 other people take 2 or more cards telling us they had pregnant women in mind to give them to. Who knows? I have also been giving them out to family, friends, my coworkers, a lady at the bank, people at church, and other random people. We will also be sending the cards in the mail to all of you who aren't living near us! Maybe just one of those cards is going to make it into the hands of our birth mother. And if she ends up reading this entry, we just want to say to her: "We love you! We are thinking of you today on Mother's Day!"

Many thanks go out to Cessi, Jerilyn, Garth, and Laura for helping us sort, price, move, and sell all of our donations. That was a serious work load! You guys were real troupers, and we would have been dead in the water without you! Also, many thanks to everybody who donated, without you we wouldn't have even had this thing in the first place. Last but not least, thanks to my aunt Billie who allowed us to have this crazy thing in her front yard and to everybody who let us borrow their card tables.